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Internet Lust:
Porn & how it affects romance
RomanticFlair.com
While it is true that there are women who view porn, there are by far more men who regularly, and yes, compulsively view pornography online. For this reason, this page speaks primarily to men.
The entrapping effect of internet porn is no surprise. If men are visual creatures, then this is the most effective way to lay the trap. Pornography is not merely a form of entertainment, though many men have convinced themselves of this and that they can break away from it at will. At some point, most men wake up and find themselves in trouble. What pornography is, is a harnessing of men's natural sex drives for a potentially lucrative outcome. The crime in all this, besides the breakdown in relationships it affects, is the exploitation of a sacred endownment--your sexuality.
Most people who enjoy sex want to be good at it, so what harm could there be in watching other people engaging in sex? Here's a thought: sex definitely has it's place in our lives, but it was not meant to be an all-consuming activity. And there is where we get caught--in our unrealistic desire for an ongoing orgasmic existence. Even Adam had to spend some time tending the garden. Once vision, desire, fantasy, and secrecy get together, a monopoly is created on our minds. And what more potent addiction than sex? So basic, so innate, so powerful!
How can a sex addiction be broken? The first step is to break the denial. Admit to yourself that you have a problem. A porn addiction exists if you are experiencing mood change, an irresistible impulse to view, a physiological dependence, the need for greater amounts and more risque types of sex, and problems breaking away. Remember also that an addiction can be present to a greater or lesser degree.
You may be suffering from guilt, depression, and/or irritability during this process. Here are some natural healing remedies from
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and Aromatherapy
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Depression:
l5 drops of Geranium Essential Oil
8 drops of Neroli Essential Oil
12 drops of Nutmeg Essential Oil
Guilt:
20 drops of Sandalwood Essential Oil
5 drops of Chamomile Essential Oil
5 drops of Clary Sage Essential Oil
Irritability:
10 drops of Nutmeg Essential Oil
8 drops of Sandalwood Essential Oil
12 drops of Pettigraine Essential Oil
Drop these oils into a tub of warm water as warm as you can stand and lie in the bath for 30 minutes every evening. If you are afraid, add 15 drops of rose essential oil to the bath. If your immune system is down because of the stress of this matter, add 10 drops of lavender to the bath.
RomanticFlair would like to recommend the use of sage essential oil to dampen sexual desire. It will help you get past this time of excessive desire. Put 3-4 drops into a glass of Rice Dream Vanilla Rice Milk and drink it down. Do this at least once-a-day.
All of these essential oils can be ordered here. Or you can buy them at Whole Foods Market or Longs.
You may or may not be able to admit your addiction to your lover, but sooner or later, there will be no hiding it. An addiction to pornography wears away at the romance of a relationship. It puts your lover's value and desirability in question. And it certainly takes up time that you would usually spend with your lover. Your fantasies when away from the computer screen will not be of your lover. An excess of anything is bound to make your partner feel uncomfortable, at the least, and anything from annoyed to frightened at worst.
Get yourself free first, then work on making your mutual lovemaking what you desire--something unique, not someone else's version of lovemaking. Let it come from your heart. And don't forget that the best sex is sex that you and your lover think up together! If you need some ideas, try our Hot Romance Coupons! You can modify these ideas to fit your own lovemaking style.
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